shiny, sparkely, Jesus

this sounds like an advertisement, and a description that doesn't quite sound reverant enough, usually, i would be mortified. but today, on this grand day of 07/08/09- something miraculous has happened.....

MY MOM DOES NOT HAVE CANCER!!!!!

isn't it glorious? weeping on the floor, thank you, thank you, Jesus wonderful? it is. and maybe to appreciate it's wonder you need the background.

my mom had cancer in 2000. and after surgery it didn't come back. my dad had cancer in 2006. and he did not win that battle. mom gets cancer for second time in 2008. (not even two years after i lost my dad.) and to be honest it just didn't seem fair. we do the surgery thing, it's gone, and we hope for the best. and one month ago, we found out that mom has cancer for third time. super bummed. defeated. bleck.

now....in the past days, during this most recent cancer dance i sat down with God and said outloud, in my big comfy chair, all alone in my apartment, in tears: "i know that there are no guarantees. and no limitations on what i should or should not have to endure because, that's not how you work, and who am i to question you. but really, i think i've had enough- for now. i need a break with all this. i know you're going to do what you do, and i'll learn to be okay with that, but please, please, please, make my mom okay. i just need that. that's it. please." now, knowing how my God works, and knowing that i've had lots of big requests in my life, and most of the time, i don't get my wish list. i instead always get to walk the "you give and take away, you are still God and worthy of my praise" road again. i don't mind that road, but it isn't my first choice this time.

but low and behold. TODAY, i got MY MIRACLE!!! i've been waiting all my life for one of those moments that i hear about. when He shows up just like you asked to give you your every desire. and He did. that's all i wanted. shiny, sparkley, Jesus showed up and took her cancer away. my mom got a call from the doc and it's gone. "i guess it must have been scar tissue", they said. never mind the fact that they nearly had my mom's surgery scheduled and her radiation weeks after that. she doesn't need it! just another check up in 3 months.

thank you, thank you, Jesus. for being so sweet to me, and showing me a side of yourself i have never experienced. i feel so special and important in your great big world of need. thank you for answering mine.