not that interesting

i'm really bad at this. i think blogging is supposed to be funny. at least, all my friends posts are really funny. funny things happen to me, but then i forget. and this week was pretty significant, so maybe i'll tell that story.

on wednesday, may 20th, i will have officially hit the nine month mark. and it's a happy anniversary. it means i've come a long way, and that the 'first year' is almost over. i've survived almost all of it. halloween, thanksgiving, our 'when we started dating' anniversary, christmas, new year's, valentine's day, easter, and now there seems to be only a few left. our wedding anniversary, his birthday, and the fourth of july. i think those will be pretty difficult. i'm going to miss camping over the fourth. we camped a lot, and those weekends were some of our happiest. i love camping. not sure that any of my friends love it, so maybe i'll have to let that one go for awhile.

this last weekend i moved. for the last time. i'm home. and it is perfect. i never thought i would be this happy to live all alone, with my little dog. though i seem to be surviving the memories of the past, i'm so excited for the future. after a long weekend of painting, moving, unloading, loading, unwrapping, and dumping. april, kelly, and i sat on my couches (that have been in a gargage for the majority of this year), turned on the tv and relaxed. that moment seemed very surreal. i can't believe i'm here. with all the things that i love. my pots and pans. my pillows. my bed. i know they are just things, and they can't make me happy, but they make me feel like i can do one of the things that brings me the most joy, and that is being a good homemaker. i'm so happy to be home. i really can't explain it. i cried out of sheer relief/joy/disbelief/humility with my mom. i'm home. i have a home. it's not anyone else's, and no one can yell at me or make me feel scared or alone or abandoned. i'm free.

i'm sitting here typing, kind of annoyed with my wordage. i like to write, and i'm crazy with proper grammar and flowing sentences. and the above jarble is horribly written in my opinion. but it reflects how i feel. totally in awe and barely able to speak. i can't quite put it into words how great it is to have a home. but i have one. and it's amazing.

that's all.