Dear Celery,
I've tried. For years, I have been trying to make this work. I walk by you in the grocery stores, and I admit, that you draw me in. I see you sitting there, and I know what you're capable of. I hear the stories people tell about how wonderful you are. I know what you have to offer. But I just have to step away. Over and over again, I've convinced myself to give you a chance. And every time I do, there you sit- in my fridge, for days, weeks, months. Until finally, I throw you in the trash. I know, I know, you're crisp and fresh, but- it isn't enough. I just, well, let me say it- I think you taste awful. I like you in my tuna salad, but that's it. I don't like you with peanut butter, or ranch, or in salads. I just can't keep this charade up anymore. I've given it my best. I've even tried preserving you in tupperware full of water. I know it gives you a longer life, but no ammount of time is enough for us. I just can't give you what you deserve. This is it. Really, this time. This is goodbye. I know that you deserve more.
Best dishes,
Megan
ha ha haa hee hee ho! I love this! You crack me up, girl. And...I must agree. Just threw out a tupperware full of the no-longer-crispy-stuff. It just ain't my friend!
ReplyDeleteyou are so funny! i had no idea you hated celery so. funny, in our last country we couldn't get celery and i wished for it a lot. i love your blog. i'm glad to get to read it. i miss you!
ReplyDeleteso i didn't know until today that you have a blog. i did only what was right and just, and started from the beginning. i'm pausing now and saying i laughed when i read best dishes - not really because it's all that funny, but because i know you well enough to picture you laughing a little when you type it. i heard that laugh in my head and it made me in turn laugh. good times, megs. now...off to read the rest.
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